It’s through our dark side that we find our true power, purpose, and Higher Self.
Since it’s October and I’ve been plagued lately by dreams of inadequacy, it seems a fitting time to talk about our shadow.
I’ve had dreams of feeling inadequate before (standing at a podium and forgetting my speech, showing up to an important event in my pj’s, etc.) but not night after night. The repetition and the cloud of negative energy that followed the dreams succeeded in getting my attention. And I’ve read enough of Dr. Carl Jung’s work to recognize the dreams were trying to tell me something more than “you’re worthless”.
Something was lurking in the dark recesses of my unconscious, a.k.a my shadow, that needed to be brought to the light of my Higher Self.
In this post, we look at what the shadow is, how it forms, and how it can lead you to your Higher Self.
What is the shadow?
“The shadow, said celebrated Swiss psychiatrist C.G. Jung, is the unknown “dark side” of our personality . . . Whatever we deem evil, inferior, or unacceptable and deny in ourselves becomes part of the shadow.”
Psychology Today
Dr. Jung coined the term “the shadow self” and hypothesized that our shadow — the parts of us we don’t like or deny — presents itself to us in dreams or visions in a variety of forms.
If you’re not familiar with Carl Gustav Jung (1875-1961), his work is fascinating and his legacy is well, legendary. He’s widely considered one of the most important figures in psychology and a legion of Jungians still follow and practice his methods today. He’s also the founder of analytical psychology and the concepts of introverts, extroverts, archetypes, and the collective unconscious.
Jung viewed the psyche (and dreams in particular) as a doorway into the discovery of the soul and wholeness — a spiritual awakening process Jung referred to as “individuation.”
How does the shadow form?
Our shadow is a collection of every negative experience that’s happened to us including inherited, instinctual, and cultural fears and events. We’re born into families and societies with established cultural customs and expectations. We quickly learn what is and what is not acceptable to our elders and society. And at an early age, we begin to repress beliefs and behaviors deemed inappropriate.
In addition, whatever has been “done to us” by society, individuals, nature, or God that we don’t accept becomes part of our shadow. Often, we don’t realize that hurt, angry, or fearful parts of us exist. IFS Therapy sheds some valuable insight on uncovering and healing these hidden parts of us. Check out this post for more information on IFS and my experience uncovering a hidden part.
The post I mentioned above is a perfect example of how the shadow forms. Essentially, a middle school bullying experience created a part of me that unconsciously reminded me that I would risk ridicule and shame if I put myself in the spotlight. That fearful part of me — that I wasn’t aware of — steered some of the major decisions of my life.
At the end of this post, we’ll talk about how to combine IFS Therapy with dream analysis to decode dreams and heal wounded parts.
The shadow isn’t only comprised of traumatic experiences.
The following examples can also add to the shadow:
- You could have been reprimanded as a child for speaking the truth and find it difficult to speak your mind even now.
- Having an over-involved (or helicopter) parent can create a shadow of fear and doubt on one’s ability to be self-sufficient and can lead to an unhealthy dependency on others.
- You may have grown up with parents who over-inflated your attributes and capabilities leading you to a superiority complex that undermines all of your relationships and everything you do.
Dreams and the shadow
Jung believed dreams were the gateway to the soul. That through the symbolism of dreams our soul could show us predictions of things to come and also point out parts of our personality that may be sabotaging us.
Through dreams one becomes acquainted with aspects of one’s own personality that for various reasons one has preferred not to look at too closely.
Man and His Symbols
Big dreams and little dreams
But not all dreams are significant messages from the soul. Jung distinguished dreams as “big” or “little”.
“Not all dreams are of equal importance. Even primitives distinguish between ‘little’ and ‘big’ dreams, or, as we might say, ‘insignificant’ and ‘significant’ dreams. Looked at more closely, ‘little’ dreams are the nightly fragments of fantasy coming from the subjective and personal sphere, and their meaning is limited to the affairs of the everyday. That is why such dreams are easily forgotten, just because their validity is restricted to the day-to-day fluctuations of the psychic balance. Significant dreams, on the other hand, are often remembered for a lifetime, and not infrequently prove to be the richest jewel in the treasure-house of psychic experience.”
Carl Jung (Psychology Today 2020)
Big dreams are the ones that linger with us, are reoccurring, or are loaded with symbolism. To appropriately decode dreams (to the best of our understanding) Jung dedicated his life’s work to studying symbolism and analyzing thousands of dreams, including his own.
Jung’s journey into his shadow
A prime example is his self-exploration experiment documented in Liber Novus a.k.a. The Red Book. The large, heavy, red-leather-bound book chronicles a 16-year dive into Jung’s unconscious to recover his soul. The book was sealed in a vault in Switzerland for decades before Jung’s descendants finally agreed to allow the book to be published in 2009. The story behind the infamous book is mystical, cryptic, and seems more like a movie than real life. This article from The New York Times is lengthy but does a great job of telling The Red Book’s tale.
The original Red Book was written in calligraphy and illustrated with beautifully detailed drawings by Jung. A carefully scanned copy of the original is available here:
A much more affordable Reader’s Edition without the calligraphy and illustrations can be found here:
Recognizing the shadow
Apart from dreams, there’s another tell-tale sign that the shadow is operating in you: judgment. Jung says that whatever annoys, offends, or provokes you in another is also in you.
If you feel an overwhelming rage coming up in you when a friend reproaches you about a fault, you can be fairly sure that at this point you will find a part of your shadow, of which you are unconscious.
Man and His Symbols
I use this as a guideline to remind me when I’m not in touch with my Higher Self. Whenever I find myself thinking he should or shouldn’t, I know there’s something within myself that I need to work on.
One of my favorite quotes by Jung (that I have above my desk) says:
“Everything that irritates us about others can lead to an understanding of ourselves.”
Carl Jung
The collective shadow
The collective shadow shows itself more frequently and to a much greater intensity in a group. Individuals can perpetrate crimes as part of a group that they would never do on their own, Jung says. War, terrorism, racism, and genocide are all products of the collective unconscious.
Analyzing dreams
Professionally, Jung wrote extensively about interpreting the meanings of symbols in dreams. But most of Jung’s writings are not what most would consider light reading. They’re academic, stuffy, and hard to get through. The only book written for the general reader is Man and His Symbols.
But, I’ll warn you. Delving into Jung’s work and dream analysis can lead you into a deep, dark labyrinth you may not be ready for. Exploring our unconscious can bring up parts of ourselves that we don’t want to acknowledge. Dreams, Jung believed, show us our demons whether we want to face them or not. But when we face our dark side we bring awareness to our shadow. And we invite our unconscious to work with us instead of against us.
Getting the help of a therapist can be very beneficial, but here are some guidelines to get started on your own.
Getting started: working with the shadow
1. Keep a Dream Journal.
Have a journal by your bed or use an app to record your dreams as soon as you wake up. Pay particular attention to symbols, phrases, voices (Jung believed hearing a disembodied voice in a dream was very significant), location, time of day, colors, etc. Write it down even if it doesn’t make sense.
2. Pay Attention to Symbols.
Jung says that the interpretation of a dream must be relatable to the dreamer. In other words, if two people have a dream about a white lion, it will mean something different to both based on their life experiences. Whether you understand the meaning of a symbol or not, the important part is writing it down in as much description as you can remember.
3. Using IFS Therapy to Decode Dream Meanings.
Parts are created from unresolved past or present feelings. Some of them may be operating in the background of our psyche unnoticed and only surface in our dreams. Often the images and symbols may seem irrational and impossible to understand. But as Jung believed, every dream has valuable information and can be decoded. Here are three good articles and examples of parts that presented themselves in dreams and how IFS Therapy helped the dreamer decode their meaning.
IFS: A New Way to Understand Your Dreams
How to Decode a Dream Despite Its Obscure Symbolism
How IFS Makes Sense of Seemingly Irrational Dreams
So, what did you dream of last night?
With You on the Journey,
Jackie
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